Take your Bibles with me and turn to 2 Samuel 19. 2 Samuel 19.

We are going to look at most of this chapter tonight and cover a story I'm going to call "The Return of the King."

What happens in this chapter, is basically what has happened in the last couple chapters in reverse. In the past few chapters the people have chosen Absalom over David in a coup, and David has been on the run from his own son. As he crossed over Jordan, people cursed David, He was led to believe that Mephibosheth, who was like a son to him, had abandoned him, and he was helped by the generosity of a bunch of men led by old Barzillai.

In chapter 19, it's like someone put the tape in the VCR and hit rewind and we are watching all of that happen in reverse.

• The people accept David.
• Shiba, who cursed David, begs for his forgiveness.
• Mephibosheth is shown to be loyal after all.
• David shows generosity to Barzillai.

It's like a great undoing of everything that has happened. But it was also a test of David's leadership.

You know, God has called us here in this journey of ours, and He has either given us or will give us a sphere of influence and maybe even a sphere of leadership. And do you know - when you think about what it means to be a leader - maybe you think that means sitting in the corner office or the big Lazyboy, holding the remote and calling the shots.

But Leadership is stepping into the mess. Life is messy. It's messy because of our own sins and shortcomings - and it's' compounded by the mess that other people bring in with their sins and shortcomings.

What we need is a Christlike spirit to navigate the mess. Tonight in 2 Samuel 19, we are going to see how David leads through the mess and in this story we will see four characteristics that every godly leader needs: patience, forgiveness, wisdom and gratitude.

These aren’t just David’s story—they point us to Jesus, the true King, and challenge us to lead like Him. So, let’s dive in tonight and learn how to lead with the mind of Christ.

Let's pray and we'll jump into our text.

(Pray)

Are you in 2 Samuel 19? We are going to start reading in verse 9 and read down to verse 15.

[!bible] 2 Samuel 19:9-15 - KJV 9. And all the people were at strife throughout all the tribes of Israel, saying, The king saved us out of the hand of our enemies, and he delivered us out of the hand of the Philistines; and now he is fled out of the land for Absalom. 10. And Absalom, whom we anointed over us, is dead in battle. Now therefore why speak ye not a word of bringing the king back? 11. And king David sent to Zadok and to Abiathar the priests, saying, Speak unto the elders of Judah, saying, Why are ye the last to bring the king back to his house? seeing the speech of all Israel is come to the king, even to his house. 12. Ye are my brethren, ye are my bones and my flesh: wherefore then are ye the last to bring back the king? 13. And say ye to Amasa, Art thou not of my bone, and of my flesh? God do so to me, and more also, if thou be not captain of the host before me continually in the room of Joab. 14. And he bowed the heart of all the men of Judah, even as the heart of one man; so that they sent this word unto the king, Return thou, and all thy servants. 15. So the king returned, and came to Jordan. And Judah came to Gilgal, to go to meet the king, to conduct the king over Jordan.

The first thing we see in David tonight that teaches us how to lead through chaos is...

1. Patience

In these verses, the tribes of Israel are in chaos because of what has happened. Absalom has risen to the throne and died, and the last they saw David, he was running away - he wasn't very king like. So the tribes are having this spirited debate about whether or not they should bring back David as king.

And David reaches out to one tribe - His tribe - Judah. Judah is hesitating on reinstating David. Maybe they felt guilty about supporting Absalom. Maybe they have just seen David's flaws a little too clearly. But they are in no hurry to reinstate David.

So what does David do? I mean, He is still God's anointed. Does he lash out? Does he make commands? Does he express personal hurt?

No, he acts with patience.

• First he meets with the priests and asks for their help and support.
• Then he sends word to Amasa, who was Abasolom's general and offers him a position of honor and prestige in his kingdom.
• Then he doesn't barge into the kingdom. He goes to the edge of Jordan and waits for Judah to bring him over.

This whole thing is a picture of patience. David isn't forcing himself on people. He is shrewdly and gently allowing the people to bring him back into leadership.

Isn't this like the Lord - there is no one more patient than the Lord. The Lord doesn't force Himself on us, but is patient with us.

[!bible] 2 Peter 3:9 - KJV 9. [The Lord] is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.

And if we are going to lead like God does, if we are going to show Christlikeness as a father or mother, or as a boss, or as a leader in the church - we have to be patient and gentle with people.

What is the fruit of the spirit?

[!bible] Galatians 5:22 - KJV 22. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, ==longsuffering, gentleness,== goodness, faith,

We have to be gentle and patient and longsuffering with people. With our kids, with the people in our church, with each other. We can't make anyone do anything. We can't really make people change - we have to win them over.

David won over the reluctance of the people to the point that the people of Judah followed him with "one heart." He showed patience.

Let's keep reading and see the next character trait of godly leadership.

[!bible] 2 Samuel 19:16-23 - KJV 16. And Shimei the son of Gera, a Benjamite, which was of Bahurim, hasted and came down with the men of Judah to meet king David. 17. And there were a thousand men of Benjamin with him, and Ziba the servant of the house of Saul, and his fifteen sons and his twenty servants with him; and they went over Jordan before the king. 18. And there went over a ferry boat to carry over the king’s household, and to do what he thought good. And Shimei the son of Gera fell down before the king, as he was come over Jordan; 19. And said unto the king, Let not my lord impute iniquity unto me, neither do thou remember that which thy servant did perversely the day that my lord the king went out of Jerusalem, that the king should take it to his heart. 20. For thy servant doth know that I have sinned: therefore, behold, I am come the first this day of all the house of Joseph to go down to meet my lord the king. 21. But Abishai the son of Zeruiah answered and said, Shall not Shimei be put to death for this, because he cursed the LORD’S anointed? 22. And David said, What have I to do with you, ye sons of Zeruiah, that ye should this day be adversaries unto me? shall there any man be put to death this day in Israel? for do not I know that I am this day king over Israel? 23. Therefore the king said unto Shimei, Thou shalt not die. And the king sware unto him.

In the first section, we saw the returning king show patience, in this second section we see him show:

2. Forgiveness

Remember, as David was running from Absalom, as he was at his lowest moment - this man Shimei took advantage of it to throw literal rocks at David and to call him every name in the book. Shimei spewed all kinds of lies against David and impugned his character. He really kicked him when he was down.

And at that point, I think it was Joab who said "let me at him." David's men were going to kill Shimei. And remember, David restrained him. He said that maybe that was the voice of the Lord.

Well, now, as David is being ushered back into power, Shimei makes sure that he is one of the first people to meet David - with a whole host of men from his tribe of Benjamin. And Shimei gets down on his face before David - he publicly humiliates himself. He wants to make sure that he is the first to meet David so he can ask forgiveness.

And he doesn't sugar coat what he did. He doesn't pretend like it was justified in any way. He says "I have sinned. I did perversely." He calls his actions "iniquity."

Now, this wasn't too long after he had just called David every name in the book and thrown rocks at him - and David's men remembered. Joab's brother Abishai said "let me at him."

But David said "shall there be any man put to death today in Israel, don't you all know that I am king today in Israel?"

And he swore to Shimei that he wouldn't kill him.

David showed patience in his dealings with Judah, and here he shows forgiveness in his dealings with Shimei.

Now, aren't you glad that our Lord is a forgiving Lord? Aren't you glad that He has given you forgiveness for all of your sins? I don't know about you but I have been so guilty before God - and there have been times when I had to slither into God's presence like Shimei and say "I have sinned." And God is always gracious, always forgiving.

But what are we supposed to do as Christians with that? The Bible tells us over and over.

[!bible] Ephesians 4:32 - KJV 32. And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

As Jesus said, we are to forgive 70 x 7 times. We have been forgiven so much - so we are to forgive so much.

I'm going to be honest with you - forgiveness is hard. If you do not think it is hard, then you have never been hurt. It's hard. There are people I've forgiven and sometimes I have to keep forgiving them, over and over and over again in my heart.

Listen to me, when talk about Christian forgiveness, we aren't talking about people who inconvenienced you. We are talking about people who truly hurt you. Spouses who were unfaithful. Parents who were abusive. Friends who stabbed you in the back. The kind of wounds that can define us.

We don't forgive other people because they deserve it. Shimei deserved to die for cursing God's annointed. We forgiven them because God has forgiven us and because He has commanded us to forgive.

Patience. Forgiveness.

Let's keep reading. Look at verse 24.

[!bible] 2 Samuel 19:24-30 - KJV 24. And Mephibosheth the son of Saul came down to meet the king, and had neither dressed his feet, nor trimmed his beard, nor washed his clothes, from the day the king departed until the day he came again in peace. 25. And it came to pass, when he was come to Jerusalem to meet the king, that the king said unto him, Wherefore wentest not thou with me, Mephibosheth? 26. And he answered, My lord, O king, my servant deceived me: for thy servant said, I will saddle me an ass, that I may ride thereon, and go to the king; because thy servant is lame. 27. And he hath slandered thy servant unto my lord the king; but my lord the king is as an angel of God: do therefore what is good in thine eyes. 28. For all of my father’s house were but dead men before my lord the king: yet didst thou set thy servant among them that did eat at thine own table. What right therefore have I yet to cry any more unto the king? 29. And the king said unto him, Why speakest thou any more of thy matters? I have said, Thou and Ziba divide the land. 30. And Mephibosheth said unto the king, Yea, let him take all, forasmuch as my lord the king is come again in peace unto his own house.

When David was fleeing the palace, Ziba met him. If you remember, Ziba had been a servant of Saul who was taking care of Jonathan's son Mephibosheth. Ziba told David that Mephibosheth was staying behind and taking advantage of the situation and because of that David gave Ziba Mephibosheth's inheritance.

Well, now David meets Mephibosheth and Mephibosheth says "no, I wasn't disloyal. I was unable to come and I was worried sick about you. I haven't even changed my clothes or taken care of my hair since you left."

And so this puts David in a bind. Who does he believe? Mephibosheth, who seems to be telling the truth - or Ziba, who was just faithful to him in his darkest trial?

The third character trait we see in this story of David's return is...

3. Wisdom

You see, this was a messy situation. Was Ziba right? Was Mephibosheth right? David had already given property to Ziba. It's a mess.

In all likelihood - they were probably both a little right and a little wrong - but David as the leader was put in the middle of them. And this required serious wisdom.

The other day, someone came to me (you don't know this person) and told me that one of her leaders (another person you don't know) had said something really cruel to her. And my son Noah heard it and when we got in the car, he was hot about it. "I can't believe that person would say that - leaders shouldn't treat people like that."

And Amanda and I had to say - buddy, you heard half the story. There is another side to it. We don't get to judge with half the story. We have to hear the other side - and probably - there is wrong on both sides to go around.

We need wisdom.

[!bible] James 1:5 - KJV 5. If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.

We serve a God who is Wisdom. Jesus is Wisdom personified. And Jesus offers us wisdom if we seek it from Him. Too often, we try to do things in our own power without seeking God's wisdom.

So we've talked about Patience, Forgiveness, Wisdom there is one more thing we see in this story and it is...

4. Gratitude

Look at verses 31-39

[!bible] 2 Samuel 19:31-39 - KJV 31. And Barzillai the Gileadite came down from Rogelim, and went over Jordan with the king, to conduct him over Jordan. 32. Now Barzillai was a very aged man, even fourscore years old: and he had provided the king of sustenance while he lay at Mahanaim; for he was a very great man. 33. And the king said unto Barzillai, Come thou over with me, and I will feed thee with me in Jerusalem. 34. And Barzillai said unto the king, How long have I to live, that I should go up with the king unto Jerusalem? 35. I am this day fourscore years old: and can I discern between good and evil? can thy servant taste what I eat or what I drink? can I hear any more the voice of singing men and singing women? wherefore then should thy servant be yet a burden unto my lord the king? 36. Thy servant will go a little way over Jordan with the king: and why should the king recompense it me with such a reward? 37. Let thy servant, I pray thee, turn back again, that I may die in mine own city, and be buried by the grave of my father and of my mother. But behold thy servant Chimham; let him go over with my lord the king; and do to him what shall seem good unto thee. 38. And the king answered, Chimham shall go over with me, and I will do to him that which shall seem good unto thee: and whatsoever thou shalt require of me, that will I do for thee. 39. And all the people went over Jordan. And when the king was come over, the king kissed Barzillai, and blessed him; and he returned unto his own place.

Remember Barzillai? He was the old rich man who helped David and his men when they were on the run from Absalom. He gave David and his men everything they needed.

And now that David is going back into power - He wants to repay Barzillai. David wants to express his gratitude. He offers Barzillai a place of prominence in his kingdom.

Now, in the story, Barzillai says "I'm too old." And he sends his servant (probably his son) instead.

Even on David's deathbed - he remembered the kindness of Barzillai and asked Solomon to treat Barzillai's family well.

Church, I think a godly and Christlike leader realizes they cannot do it on their own. David would not have made it through this without help from some wonderful people like Barzillai - and he remembered that with gratitude.

God is good to us - even in ways we do not deserve - and often God is good to us through the goodness of others. I know I've experienced so much grace from you. And I'm thankful for it - I do not say it enough.

If you are in a position of leadership - maybe stop and try to say thank you to those who have helped you. A little gratitude goes a long way - and it shows the heart of Christ.

[!bible] 1 Thessalonians 5:18 - KJV 18. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.

Maybe you need to find a person who has been a Barzillai to you and just say thank you.

Conclusion

Tonight, we’ve walked with David across the Jordan in 2 Samuel 19, seeing The Return of the King. Through the mess of rebellion and restoration, David showed four traits every godly leader needs:

• Patience, gently winning back Judah’s loyalty.
• Forgiveness, sparing Shimei despite his sin.
• Wisdom, navigating the messy truth between Mephibosheth and Ziba.
• Gratitude, honoring Barzillai’s faithfulness with generosity.

These aren’t just leadership tips; they’re a picture of a Christlike heart.

Christological Connection: David’s story points us to Jesus, the true King.

• Jesus is patient, waiting for us to turn to Him (2 Peter 3:9).
• He’s forgiving, washing away our sins on the cross (Ephesians 1:7).
• He’s wise, judging every heart with perfect truth (John 7:24).
• And He’s grateful, promising to reward every act of faithfulness (Revelation 22:12).

David’s return was messy, but Jesus’ return will be glorious, and He calls us to lead like Him until that day.

So in what way do you need to grow to be more like Jesus this week - maybe pick one of those things and make it a special emphasis.

• Maybe you need to be patient and gentle in your dealings with people.
• Maybe there is someone you need to show forgiveness to.
• Maybe you need to seek God's wisdom more.
• Maybe you just need to say thank you.

let's work on becoming more like Christ. Let's stand for prayer.