When things don't go our way

author: Ryan Hayden Take your Bibles with me and turn to 1 Samuel 29. 1 Samuel 29.

Last week, we were in our revival services, so we didn't have a message from the stories of the Bible. But the week before that we were talking about Saul going to the witch at Endor.

We are in this section here at the end of 1 Samuel where things are escalating quickly. There is a full on war between the Philistines and Israel - a war that will kill King Saul in chapter 31.

David is actually set up to fight on the Philistine side of that war, because remember, David went over to the Philistines. He stopped having faith in God to protect him and trusted the Philistines to protect him. David is in the middle of this long period where he is backslidden from God.

So we are going to focus again tonight on David and look at what happens in chapters 29-30.

I want to start tonight by reading chapter 29 in its entirety - because I feel like chapter 29 is a setup for what happens in chapter 30.

Let's go ahead and read that:

[!bible] 1 Samuel 29:1-11 - KJV

1. Now the Philistines gathered together all their armies to Aphek: and the Israelites pitched by a fountain which is in Jezreel.
2. And the lords of the Philistines passed on by hundreds, and by thousands: but David and his men passed on in the rereward with Achish.
3. Then said the princes of the Philistines, What do these Hebrews here? And Achish said unto the princes of the Philistines, Is not this David, the servant of Saul the king of Israel, which hath been with me these days, or these years, and I have found no fault in him since he fell unto me unto this day?
4. And the princes of the Philistines were wroth with him; and the princes of the Philistines said unto him, Make this fellow return, that he may go again to his place which thou hast appointed him, and let him not go down with us to battle, lest in the battle he be an adversary to us: for wherewith should he reconcile himself unto his master? should it not be with the heads of these men?
5. Is not this David, of whom they sang one to another in dances, saying, Saul slew his thousands, and David his ten thousands?
6. Then Achish called David, and said unto him, Surely, as the LORD liveth, thou hast been upright, and thy going out and thy coming in with me in the host is good in my sight: for I have not found evil in thee since the day of thy coming unto me unto this day: nevertheless the lords favour thee not.
7. Wherefore now return, and go in peace, that thou displease not the lords of the Philistines.
8. And David said unto Achish, But what have I done? and what hast thou found in thy servant so long as I have been with thee unto this day, that I may not go fight against the enemies of my lord the king?
9. And Achish answered and said to David, I know that thou art good in my sight, as an angel of God: notwithstanding the princes of the Philistines have said, He shall not go up with us to the battle.
10. Wherefore now rise up early in the morning with thy master’s servants that are come with thee: and as soon as ye be up early in the morning, and have light, depart.
11. So David and his men rose up early to depart in the morning, to return into the land of the Philistines. And the Philistines went up to Jezreel.

So in this chapter, the Philistines are mounting this all out attack on Israel. They have marched into the heart of Israel and brought a huge army to fight against Saul.

Back in chapter 27, Achich, the Philistine king that David was working for, had asked David to be his personal bodyguard as he goes to fight against Israel. For the first time, David is going to have to fight with the Philistines against God's people. There is no way out of it.

But here, in this chapter, David runs into a problem. The other Philistine leaders are getting ready to fight, and they see David and his men and they say "What are these Hebrews doing here?"

They are saying "No. This is not going to work. We can't be going into battle against Israel with a bunch of Israeli soldiers in our rear protecting our king."

But they ask "What are these Hebrews doing here?"

That's a great question. At this point, David was so backslidden that I think he wanted to fight. The enemies of God could see what David couldn't - that God's people had no business fighting with the Philistines.

You know, there are times (and this is sad) when lost people have to look at Christians and say "What are they doing here? They don't belong here." The Christians don't see it, but the lost people do - and that is a shame.

I went to one party as a teenager that I shouldn't have gone to. I knew I shouldn't have been there. One of the kids who was at the party who knew me from church came to me and said "Aren't you, like a Christian? Aren't you a good kid? What are you doing here?"

I ended up asking someone to take me home. I shouldn't have come in the first place.

Young people, maybe in a backslidden state you end up at a party you shouldn't be at. Maybe at a bar. Maybe at a tattoo parlor. Maybe at a rock concert. The world knows you don't belong in places like that - do you?

David in this story seems genuinely disappointed that he can't fight. He seems hurt by the insinuation of these men. He is loyal to Achich and wants everyone to know it. Get this: He is so backslidden he is with the Philistines. He seems like he wants to fight with the Philistines.. A few chapters back he was fighting the Philistines, now he's sad he can't fight with them. And he protests when they send him home.

David is genuinely disappointed. Things are not going his way.

Him and his men trudge back the 75 miles back to Ziklag in 3 days - hoofing it 25 miles per day. And their pride hurts. They were sent home from the battle.

I want to talk to you tonight about when things don't go our way. When things don't go our way.

Sometimes in life, we are seriously disappointed. Sometimes things don't go our way. We expect something to happen. We really want something to happen. And then the rug is pulled out from us.

Many years ago, Amanda and I were gearing up to travel to South Carolina for my brother's wedding. It was a few weeks away...and she called it off. It was, as you can imagine, a very devastating turn of events for my brother.

I remember when I left college and went back to New Hampshire. I had this idea in my mind that I was going to stay there for many years and be the youth pastor in my church. But we weren't there long before the church got a new pastor, and he let me know right away that wasn't going to happen. He told us we could stay for one more year. Well, we stayed for one more year and that whole time I thought "He'll change his mind. We'll get to stay." He didn't, that was devastating to me.

Maybe you've been in a similar situation:

• Your long time husband or wife says "I want a divorce."
• The doctor gives you bad news.
• Your kids write you out of their life.
• The job you were hoping for and counting on doesn't come through.

What are we supposed to do when life doesn't go our way? When we are disappointed and hurt like David was here in this story? I think we can get some answers in chapters 29-30 of 1 Samuel.

The first thing we can learn is...

1. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is trying to get us to fully identify with His people.

In this chapter - David has started to identify as a Philistine. He has started to think of himself more like one of Goliath's people than Israel's people. He has gone into the world, and He has stated to love the world.

Remember, one of the Devil's biggest temptations for us is to assimilate into the world. All through the New Testament we had to be reminded that "friendship with the world is enmity with God"(James 4:4) and to "come out from among them and be ye separate." (2 Corinthians 6:17) and "Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world." (1 John 2:15).

Let's be honest, the world pulls on us. We want to be accepted by the world. We want to be admired by the world.

And sometimes, God serves us up a plate of disappointment so that we learn not to identify with the world but to identify with Him and His people.

I think we can learn a second reason why God allows things to not go our way in this chapter:

2. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is trying to keep us from mistakes we can't go back from.

If David had went to fight against Israel like he seemed to want to in chapter 29 - do you think he would ever have been king of Israel? I don't. I think that would have been a mistake that would have permanently hindered his usefulness to God. I think it would have made him a castaway.

Sometimes, we want something that is the first step in a path that will take us so far away from God, that we will be forever hindered in our usefulness to Him.

• Maybe that job would take you out of church.
• Maybe that friendship would lead to you being unfaithful to your spouse.
• Maybe that new city would pull you away from the community where God wanted you to make a difference. Maybe that money would ruin you and consume all of your time and energy.

I don't know your situation - but God does and God orders things according to His plan. His plan is always good.

author: Ryan Hayden

As we continue into chapter 30, David's disappointments are going to continue and intensify.

Remember, David and his men were given the city of Ziklag as a home. As they marched back with their pride hurt, sent away from thee battlefield, they probably were trying to make good time so they could get home to their wives and kids and enjoy the pleasures of home.

But that wasn't to be. Look at chapter 30 verses 1-6:

[!bible] 1 Samuel 30:1-6 - KJV

1. And it came to pass, when David and his men were come to Ziklag on the third day, that the Amalekites had invaded the south, and Ziklag, and smitten Ziklag, and burned it with fire;
2. And had taken the women captives, that were therein: they slew not any, either great or small, but carried them away, and went on their way.
3. So David and his men came to the city, and, behold, it was burned with fire; and their wives, and their sons, and their daughters, were taken captives.
4. Then David and the people that were with him lifted up their voice and wept, until they had no more power to weep.
5. And David’s two wives were taken captives, Ahinoam the Jezreelitess, and Abigail the wife of Nabal the Carmelite.
6. And David was greatly distressed; for the people spake of stoning him, because the soul of all the people was grieved, every man for his sons and for his daughters: but David encouraged himself in the LORD his God.

This is probably the biggest test David ever faced. As they came around the bend, exited to see home, they saw smoke. Their city was burned to the ground. Everything and everyone had been taken, even their wives and kids.

In a moment David and his men had lost everything:

• They were fugitives in Israel.
• The Philistines didn't want them anymore.
• Now they lost all their stuff and their families.

David had lost even more than that - because his faithful men - the men who had been with him now for years started turning on him and talking about stoning him.

David was truly, completely, alone. This was the lowest point in his entire life.

They wept. The scriptures say they wept until they couldn't weep anymore. This is total depression and despondency. Absolute heart break.

David had double reason to weep - not only had he lost everything - but it was all his fault.

This is turning out to be one no-good, really-bad terrible day.

But notice what David did - finally - David "encouraged himself in the Lord."

And that is the third reason why God allows for things to not go our way:

3. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is bringing us back to Him.

"David encouraged himself in the Lord." This is the first time in 16 months David had done this. He's been backslidden. Now with everything gone - God finally has his attention again.

Chuck Swindoll put it like this:

David had reached the point in life where some people think of taking their own lives. He was so far down the ladder of despair that he’d reached the bottom rung. The last stop. The place where you either jump off into oblivion or you cry out to God for His forgiveness. For rescue. The wonderful thing is that we do have that choice, because God never gives up on His children.

Listen, sometimes God puts us down and things don't go our way because He is trying to get us to look up to Him. To go to Him for mercy. To rely on Him again.

I imagine David in there singing "Lord I need you."

And don't miss this - even when you lose everything, even when you are on your back at the very bottom of the slough of despond - you can still encourage yourself in the Lord.

• God is still good, even when our circumstances are not.
• God is still on the throne.
• God's promises are still in place.
• We can still remember God's past provisions.
• We can encourage ourself in God's future plans.
• We can always encourage ourself in the Lord.

author: Ryan Hayden

Let's keep going in our story and see some more reasons why God doesn't allow things to go our way sometimes.

Look at verses 7-8:

[!bible] 1 Samuel 30:7-8 - KJV 7. And David said to Abiathar the priest, Ahimelech’s son, I pray thee, bring me hither the ephod. And Abiathar brought thither the ephod to David. 8. And David enquired at the LORD, saying, Shall I pursue after this troop? shall I overtake them? And he answered him, Pursue: for thou shalt surely overtake them, and without fail recover all.

Not only did this experience at Ziklag cause David to encourage himself in the Lord - it also caused Him to start seeking God's will again.

So...

4. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is teaching us to seek His will.

In the Old Testament, the High Priest wore a breastplate, and in that breastplate was the Urim and the Thumin - two stones that God used to let people know His will. Now, this isn't how it works in the New Testament - where we have the full word of God - but in the Old Testament this was a way God gave His word to people.

That breastplate (and the only living priest) happened to be with David at Ziklag, and David used it to seek God's will about what he should do. David was seeking God's will through God's word.

Sometimes, God puts us in a place where we have no answers so we have to look to Him for direction again. We should look to Him for direction all along - but sometimes He has to force us to.

So it was with David. He wanted to know if he should pursue these men - God said yes. He wanted to know if He would be successful - God said yes.

So now, David isn't just acting on his own - He is acting on the will of God. His men, who were about to stone him a few minutes ago, see His renewed faith and decide to follow Him.

Let's keep reading (we are going to read verse 9 through 20):

[!bible] 1 Samuel 30:9-20 - KJV 9. So David went, he and the six hundred men that were with him, and came to the brook Besor, where those that were left behind stayed. 10. But David pursued, he and four hundred men: for two hundred abode behind, which were so faint that they could not go over the brook Besor. 11. And they found an Egyptian in the field, and brought him to David, and gave him bread, and he did eat; and they made him drink water; 12. And they gave him a piece of a cake of figs, and two clusters of raisins: and when he had eaten, his spirit came again to him: for he had eaten no bread, nor drunk any water, three days and three nights. 13. And David said unto him, To whom belongest thou? and whence art thou? And he said, I am a young man of Egypt, servant to an Amalekite; and my master left me, because three days agone I fell sick. 14. We made an invasion upon the south of the Cherethites, and upon the coast which belongeth to Judah, and upon the south of Caleb; and we burned Ziklag with fire. 15. And David said to him, Canst thou bring me down to this company? And he said, Swear unto me by God, that thou wilt neither kill me, nor deliver me into the hands of my master, and I will bring thee down to this company. 16. And when he had brought him down, behold, they were spread abroad upon all the earth, eating and drinking, and dancing, because of all the great spoil that they had taken out of the land of the Philistines, and out of the land of Judah. 17. And David smote them from the twilight even unto the evening of the next day: and there escaped not a man of them, save four hundred young men, which rode upon camels, and fled. 18. And David recovered all that the Amalekites had carried away: and David rescued his two wives. 19. And there was nothing lacking to them, neither small nor great, neither sons nor daughters, neither spoil, nor any thing that they had taken to them: David recovered all. 20. And David took all the flocks and the herds, which they drave before those other cattle, and said, This is David’s spoil.

David and his 600 men chase after these men. They get to a river and 200 of his men can't make it. (Remember, they have already travelled 75 miles on foot in three days.) They stay behind and guard the provisions.

They run into an Egyptian man who tells them it was the Amalekites. Remember, Saul was supposed to kill the Amalekites.

IT's interesting, in Exodus, the children of Israel were talking about stoning Moses right before a victory over the Amalekites - and here the same thing happens to David.

David takes his 400 remaining men and attacks the Amalekite camp. They are all drunk, so it is easy work, but still they are outnumbered and they fight from morning till night. Eliminating the enemy.

Fortunately, their wives and children are unharmed, and not only do they get everything back, they also get a good amount of spoil.

Look at verses 21-25:

[!bible] 1 Samuel 30:21-25 - KJV 21. And David came to the two hundred men, which were so faint that they could not follow David, whom they had made also to abide at the brook Besor: and they went forth to meet David, and to meet the people that were with him: and when David came near to the people, he saluted them. 22. Then answered all the wicked men and men of Belial, of those that went with David, and said, Because they went not with us, we will not give them ought of the spoil that we have recovered, save to every man his wife and his children, that they may lead them away, and depart. 23. Then said David, Ye shall not do so, my brethren, with that which the LORD hath given us, who hath preserved us, and delivered the company that came against us into our hand. 24. For who will hearken unto you in this matter? but as his part is that goeth down to the battle, so shall his part be that tarrieth by the stuff: they shall part alike. 25. And it was so from that day forward, that he made it a statute and an ordinance for Israel unto this day.

David and his men and all the spoil get back to the 200 guys who stayed by the stuff and some of the soldiers dont' want to share with them.

David speaks up and says "No. This is God's victory. We are going to give them an equal part."

There is an important principle here I don't have time to get into - but the principle is that the supply chain is just as important as the front line. In God's work, often there are people behind the scenes that make the whole thing possible - maybe you are one of those people. You may not get the glory - but in God's eyes, you have just as much a part in what happens as what I do.

Anyways, let's read the rest of the chapter and we'll see the last reason why God doesn't let us get our own way sometimes:

[!bible] 1 Samuel 30:26-31 - KJV 26. And when David came to Ziklag, he sent of the spoil unto the elders of Judah, even to his friends, saying, Behold a present for you of the spoil of the enemies of the LORD; 27. To them which were in Bethel, and to them which were in south Ramoth, and to them which were in Jattir, 28. And to them which were in Aroer, and to them which were in Siphmoth, and to them which were in Eshtemoa, 29. And to them which were in Rachal, and to them which were in the cities of the Jerahmeelites, and to them which were in the cities of the Kenites, 30. And to them which were in Hormah, and to them which were in Chor-ashan, and to them which were in Athach, 31. And to them which were in Hebron, and to all the places where David himself and his men were wont to haunt.

So far we've said:

1. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is trying to get us to fully identify with His people.
2. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is trying to keep us from mistakes we can't go back from.
3. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is bringing us back to Him.
4. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is teaching us to seek His will.

There is one more reason I think we can see in this story:

5. Sometimes things do not go our way because God is using them for a better way in the future.

You see, the spoils David took here, he generously distributed to the men in Judah who had helped him. He gave away a lot of spoils.

Well, what happens next? What happens next is Saul dies. The people of Judah make David their king. He's not the king of Israel right away, but the king of Judah. He stays that way for six years before he becomes king over all Israel.

Do you see - without David's disappointment, without the tragedy at Ziklag, David would not have given these gifts and may not have been accepted as the king of Judah.

This event at Ziklag, which might have seemed like a setback or detour, was actually part of God's plan to elevate David. By sharing the spoils, David not only showed his gratitude and leadership but also built alliances and loyalty among the people of Judah, which was crucial for his later acceptance as king over all Israel.

This may have seemed to man like it was way out of the way - but God has a way of connecting the dots. What looked like a detour was actually a divine setup, preparing David for his ultimate role. The hardship and the subsequent generosity were stepping stones in God's larger narrative for David's life, demonstrating that our current struggles or disappointments might just be the groundwork for future blessings or positions we cannot yet see.

Romans 8:28 says:

[!bible] Romans 8:28 - KJV 28. And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

God can work it out. All things. Very often, those "all things" include things we wouldn't choose - they aren't the way we would choose. But they are the way He chooses for us - and His way is good.

Brother Adam, come and lead us in prayer.